We look the world through our glasses.We all have our experiences and expectations.Buddha has said that ‘truth cannot be said.’ Whatever you say,when it reaches me,goes through filters of my knowledge,understanding about this world.That is why we need to be very clear and we need to take extra efforts to clarify our thoughts.Ever thought why a particular teacher is good or bad ? The one who can’t explain his/her point to you.That is why teachers ,philosophers or mentors always explain it twice or thrice or more times, in different ways by taking different examples.
It is widely known that this particular problem is more pronounced in male -female conversations.This happens primarily due to the different thinking style of men and women.
Women are more indirect,more disguised (due to societal programming),while men are more direct,precise and concise.
A lady would say ‘ I am in bad mood’ Man will understand literally and may switch on TV for you!
While she may mean
- I am angry over last night’s argument.
- I want a kiss
- I want to go to movie
- Get me a cold vanilla flavor ice cream
- Just sit with me for a while and give me a warm hug
How can poor man decode this man variations ?
Yes once the comfort level is established we get to understand each others mood with out exact explanation.Men tend to decode women’s indirect language and women start to learn straightforwardness of men,the poor men!
Solution : Try to be more clear and direct.Misunderstandings kill people.